Hills Like White Elephants

So despite my giving up on quality school work until musical is over, I got a 3.695 gpa. I'm super proud. I went up from the 90's to the 70's in class rank.

I'm not overwhelmed with tiredness anymore, as I was up until a few weeks ago. I'm still stressed but at least I'm not worried about depression. Scary shit. I need to stop eating snacks at musical though.

Angie and I haven't talked much this week, idk why. Sometimes we get too mucho of eachother and we need breaks. Bdubs thurs so yay! What the hell day is it?

Wow. I hate this post. I really dont have anything to write about.

I'm loving Hemingway. We read a section of In Our Time called "Big Two-Hearted River" and we also read Hills Like White Elephants. Damn, I hate inferring. I'm happy when I'm right and satisfied when i find out what this guy was saying. I'm really enraged at this Hills story though. I was right when I read it. He wants her to get an abortion, the elephants are like the breasts when you get preg or like the baby bump itself blah blah. Sexist/feminist themes get me soo fired up. I don't know what to think. The guy in the story is a supreme asshole. Plus it's the 20's so she'll probably die in the abortion. I also get really fired up when people aren't living the lives they want. Sometimes things are too complex to change, but I feel like if she wanted to settle down she could get out of her abusive relationship. I feel for her though. She's only a girl.

I'm only a girl, too. Only, I don't want to settle down.  I want to try things and meet all sorts of people. I really like hearing stories, and listening.  I like talking to people who have plans. I like drinking shit coffee and being with fun people. I realized the idea of getting intoxicated sounds like more chances for me to make mistakes. I don't know, just something I realized lately. I also realized how much I've learned since October; and how much I am exactly the same since sophmore year.

I recently re read notes I wrote in October. I hated ex, I loved lace, and I wanted to go to Mexico. I had just "come out" as an Atheist. I had just started senior year and used Bobby to go to the Homecoming festivities I wanted to go to. I've changed so much because I was into bows and I didn't know what I wanted.

I have been partnered up with an ex best friend for Psychology; we have to do a study on smell and taste. She stopped talking to me during the beginning of junior year and it hurt my feelings tons. All I had was Tyler, then Angie too. But guess what, it was mostly Tyler. Damn. Shelby hasn't changed, and I realized... so haven't I. If she stopped talking for the reason I think, we couldn't be friends ever again.

I've actually had my own drama instead of sitting watching others. Theres two more bitches hating on me, I've been a bitch to someone, and thats about all  I care to divulge. I deleted my myspace. Sorry, Leslie. It felt against the rules to talk to you anyway.

I've become addicted to the news and the war. This war is fucking bullshit. And Obama does not know what he is doing. LeClair tells me his stories from being in Iraq and Afghanistan. It was brutal. I can't imagine the courage it takes to be in the military. I've become very patriotic and I wish my gramps were around. He was fucking awesome. I guess if youre a lieutenant colonel people have to stand up when you walk in the room. That's my def of BA. I'm not glorifying war, I'm glorifying the people who go out there for us. Jsyk. I'm like the only one who says the pledge in the morning. It's important. We live in America and the pledge just reminds me of that every morning at 7:26am. I like it when Lauren says the pledge. I'm so excited to get close with her and Kyle too.